one thing about deployment is that it just buffers you away from the world. and when you come out of it after two days you are like:wow. hmmm, that was how it was for both the myanmmar disaster and the szechuan earthquake. like something so big but it hits you late. the footages of the earthquake and all is heartbreaking. reading the papers on the issue just makes you want to cry. gosh. the crude thing is the cliche: that's life. you know that after a month or so, you forget it. although at this moment it makes you lose your appetite and all. that's really life. the reaction to stuff.


caught up with some buddies the last week or so. hope to catch up with more people and get back into the groove of having a life outside ns. reflected after reading yy's messages. hmmm, indeed i have been spending so much time with ns friends. that and some recent issues with myself in camp got me thinking. ya, maybe i was wrong. sorry to everyone who cared but felt that i ddin't. i really do.


still very lost on my choices which is not that often. to law or not to law. now it's to london or not to london. i feel quite abit of my ruthlessness being lost. that edge that made me so overbearing and all. now all that's left is an arrogant self. shell. domineering:less so. with myself, i need to take control once again. i think the reason should be the change of people around me. the most important people around me make my priority and focus and thus character and mood. the change of these peope and the role they play in my life changed everything. with the return of the old group, maybe i get back to where i belong.



so many things i wanted to get the last week or so but won't. the shirt at central. the levis jeans on discount. itouch. that sabo keychain.

you.